Maybe you are a mother of a teenager who has noticed something “off” about your child’s recent behaviors – or that of your teen’s significant other. Maybe you are a teenager who is beginning to feel uneasy about how you have been treated and are wondering if it is “normal.” Maybe you are afraid to say anything about your own relationship or a friend’s; afraid you will be accused of being paranoid, nosy, or jealous.
Adolescence is complex enough as it is, and it is crucial to address the nearly 1 in 3 adolescents in the United States who are victims of physical, sexual, emotional or verbal abuse from a dating partner with teenagers between 16 and 24 being at the highest risk1. It is important to note that teen dating violence is significantly underreported. Many victims are hesitant to come forward due to fear, shame, or lack of awareness about available support.
The repercussions of teen dating violence are associated with adverse mental health outcomes. Victims may experience depression, anxiety, suicidal ideation, and substance abuse as a result of the trauma.
Understanding Teen Dating Violence
Teen dating violence refers to the physical, emotional, or sexual abuse that occurs within a romantic or intimate relationship among teenagers. This can manifest in various forms, such as verbal abuse, controlling behaviors, physical violence, or digital abuse through social media platforms. Often, these situations are overlooked or dismissed, perpetuating a cycle of harm. Abusive relationships often involve power and control, where one partner seeks dominance over the other. By identifying signs and patterns, we can intervene early and break the cycle.
Digital dating violence has become increasingly prevalent in this era dominated by technology. Harassment, stalking, and the dissemination of explicit content without consent are forms of abuse that occur online. Keeping an open line of communication and educating teenagers with the knowledge to navigate the digital landscape safely is crucial in preventing these forms of abuse.
Promoting Healthy Relationships
Empathy and awareness also extend to promoting positive and healthy relationships. By emphasizing the importance of communication, mutual respect, and consent, we can empower teenagers to build relationships based on trust and understanding. Teaching conflict resolution skills and encouraging open dialogue can contribute to the creation of a culture that rejects violence.
Schools, parents, and guardians are instrumental in shaping the attitudes and behaviors of young individuals. Implementing comprehensive education programs and having open discussions about consent, boundaries, and respect lays the foundation of developing healthy relationships.
These conversations help create a supportive environment where teens feel empowered to speak out against dating violence. It is essential for adults to actively listen to their teenagers, creating a space where they feel comfortable discussing their relationships without fear of judgment.
Warning Signs of Teen Dating Violence
These are common warning signs of abusive relationships. Not all of them must be present for someone to be in a violent relationship.
Excessive jealousy
A partner may begin displaying intense jealousy, attempting to control the other’s interactions with friends and family, or becoming upset when the victim spends time away from them.
Isolation
The abuser may attempt to isolate the victim from friends and family, making it difficult for them to maintain healthy relationships outside of the romantic partnership.
Verbal and/or Emotional Abuse
Constant criticism, humiliation and verbal insults can be warning signs. Emotional manipulation, guilt-tripping, or playing mind games are also red flags.
Physical Violence
Any form of physical aggression including hitting, slapping or pushing is a clear indication of an unhealthy and potentially dangerous relationship.
Controlling Partner
A controlling partner may try to dictate where their victim goes, what they wear, and/or who they spend time with. Monitoring the victim’s activities through texts or social media is another warning sign.
Changes in Behavior
Sudden changes in behavior, such as withdrawal from social activities, declining academic performance, or drastic mood swings, may be indicative of an abusive relationship.
Other warning signs include unwanted sexual advances, being controlling of money, become fearful of their partner, or threats of violence may indicate an abusive or potentially abusive relationship.
Teen dating violence is a pervasive issue that often remains shrouded in silence.
As friends, parents, guardians, co-workers, and religious leaders, we can foster empathy and awareness to create a safer and more supportive environment for young individuals.
It is through collective efforts that we can dismantle the barriers that perpetuate teen dating violence, paving the way for a future marked by understanding and compassion. If you, or someone you know, may be experiencing teen dating violence, tell someone.
1 The National Survey on Teen Relationships and Intimate Violence (STRiV). (2016).
Journal of Interpersonal Violence. (2017). Teen Dating Violence (Physical and Sexual) Among US High School Students