I consider myself to be a very organized, prepared person, so before my twins were born I thought I had covered everything. Go-bag. Check. Nursery. Check. Meals prepped. Check. One thing I had not prepared for: my own recovery after the girls arrived.
Bringing a new life (or two) into the world is a beautiful whirlwind of change. Not only are sleep and caring for a newborn challenging, but emotions and various facets of postpartum recovery can creep up on you if you don’t expect them. Every woman has a unique experience. Some friends of mine delivered vaginally and were out shopping with their baby two days after giving birth. Others had horrible tears that required additional care. Mine was a c-section that left me on the couch for five days feeling helpless. This phase is often overlooked, but deserves attention, care, and understanding.
Physical Recovery
Whether you have had a c-section or delivered vaginally, take your doctor’s orders seriously. No one wants to deal with a painful infection while you are taking care of a newborn. Be sure to keep the wound clean and dry and watch for increasing redness or a hot feeling to the touch.
In the weeks or months after giving birth, your body is once again on a hormone rollercoaster. We all know hormones change our moods and emotions, but it can also impact things like our hair. When I began losing huge clumps of hair in the shower I was worried. Turns out it is quite common, but I had no idea! Ask your doctor (and friends who have had children) what to expect. Your experience may be different, but at least you will know you are not alone!
Expect your pelvic floor and abs to take a while to recover – and to need special exercises to get back to where they were before baby came along. The bands in your stomach had to stretch to allow for more room as your pregnancy progressed. Many women end up with a separation between the two abdominal muscles, which is referred to as Diastasis Recti. Weak abdominal muscles can lead to core instability, back or posture issues and sometimes constipation. Bladder and pelvic muscles are also impacted during pregnancy. No one thinks about dealing with a leaky bladder – until it happens to them. Discuss with your doctor which exercises will help with Diastasis Recti and incontinence and when it is safe to begin.
Emotional Well-Being
Postpartum emotions can change from one moment to the next: from joy and elation to uncertainty or even sadness. “Baby blues” refer to the first few weeks after delivery while your body is re-balancing your hormones. If anxiety, crying or restlessness continue, or if you have feelings of hurting yourself or your baby, you are not a bad mom! Some women’s hormones need help getting back on track. See your doctor promptly. Don’t feel guilty asking for help – be proud of yourself for helping you and your baby have a strong start! And don’t skip your postpartum check-up – even if you feel fine. Your doctor sees new moms every day and can be a great source of information!
Building a Strong Support Network
Moms are strong. No doubt about it. We become expert nose-wipers, diaper changers, meal-preppers, alphabet-teachers…you name it! But what we are not always good at is asking for help. It often makes us feel like a failure or that we can’t do everything. Ding, ding, ding! Guess what?! We can’t! And we don’t have to! I love meeting people’s needs, and I’ve learned that when I get turned down I feel like I am being robbed of being a blessing to others. Allow your partner, friends and family to help around the house – even if you can do it yourself. Take time to rest, heal, and bond with your baby. It is sometimes helpful to keep a list handy of things that need to be done, so that when someone asks you can say, “Well, here is my to-do list if there is anything on there you would enjoy doing.” This gives them a choice of how to help, and you don’t have to try to think of something on the fly that needs to be done!
Postpartum recovery is a transformation period that requires patience and support. Remember, there is no one-size-fits-all experience. Take time to nurture yourself physically, emotionally and spiritually and seek help when needed. And always remember to consult your physician for personalized guidance and care during this incredible part of your life.
Resources
• Mayo Clinic. (n.d.). Postpartum Depression.
• University of Colorado Women’s Health. Urogynecology. (n.d.). Incontinence After Childbirth.
• Cleveland Clinic. (n.d.). Diastasis Recti.