My Adoption Story

Journey Women's Center — Tue, 22 Aug 2023 18:23:45 +0000

I was 15. I was in denial, but now almost two months had passed and I had to know for sure. I parked the car far off and walked the rest of the way to Planned Parenthood. I was so nervous someone would recognize me! No one knew my secret.

“Well, here it is.” My test was positive and I felt very alone. The clinic staff were so…cold. It was the worst feeling ever. I didn’t know what to do. My boyfriend was shocked when he found out and I could sense he didn’t want me to keep the baby. But I hadn’t yet made up my mind what to do, so I went back to “life as usual” and remained busy in sports and with school. I tried not to think about it too much and completed my sophomore year.

Summer started and I knew I couldn’t hide my secret much longer. I was starting to show. By July, my parents began to suspect something was going on. Normally, I would have been at the pool and hanging out with friends, but now I stayed home and kept to myself. Soon they asked, and I had to say “yes”. They were surprised and sad. We all cried together. I had been so afraid of their reaction, so afraid of what would happen when they found out, but in the end, I found only love and support.

I could feel her moving, this new little life growing inside me. I knew I had a decision to make. I was too young to be a parent. There were things I wanted to do and I knew that at almost 16, I wasn’t able to give her the life she needed. Adoption felt like the best option. It would be hard, but deep down I knew it was the right decision. My doctor had information about a family that was looking to adopt; I agreed to a closed adoption. This decision made me feel safe and secure, knowing she would be loved and cared for by a family.

She was born in November. My boyfriend came to see me at the hospital and we picked up where we left off. I had missed a semester and was nervous about starting back to school, wondering what awaited me. But my friends welcomed me with open arms. Inwardly, I was emotionally torn. It was really hard at first. I missed my baby and carried the thought of her every day, but I was also happy to go on with my life. I knew she was in a good place and that she was loved.

The years went by. I graduated high school, then college. I started my career. I got married and had children. More than 30 years has passed since my daughter was born.

These days open adoptions are quite common. The birth mother has contact and opportunity for an on-going relationship with the child and adoptive parents. Because of my closed adoption, the records were sealed and I had no idea my daughter had been searching for me until my son came home one day to tell me that the DNA test he took revealed he had a half-sister. What a surprise! She and I started talking and a few months later we met for the first time. I have a grandson and I am building a relationship with my daughter, something I never dreamed was possible. She has respect for me and the choices I made, and understands the decision to choose adoption was one of loving sacrifice.

Adoption was a hard decision. But it was one I never regretted. I am so thankful that I gave my daughter a chance at life.

The post My Adoption Story appeared first on Journey Women's Center | Enid, OK.

What are my pregnancy options?

Journey Women's Center — Tue, 15 Aug 2023 13:51:19 +0000

Whether you’ve missed your period or watched that little line appear on the pregnancy test, you’re at a crossroads. Right now, you’re trying to decide what to do. You’re pregnant and your mind is racing with questions of, “what now?”.

Maybe you’re feeling stressed, overwhelmed, or even a little scared. These emotions are completely normal. Abortion might seem like the easiest solution. No one will know that you are pregnant and you can move on with your life. But it’s not quite that simple, and it’s important to know your options.

Three Pregnancy Options

Abortion

Abortion is the ending of a pregnancy through a medical or surgical method.

There are possible complications and risks involved in any abortion. Medical abortions, or the abortion pill, involves taking a pill at the abortion clinic (mifepristone) and another at home (misoprostol). An ultrasound is required to determine the gestation (how far along you are), as these can only be performed up to 10 weeks.

Severe cramping and bleeding (up to 45 days) can occur with the abortion pill, and it’s important to have a follow-up appointment to verify the abortion is complete. Pregnancy resource centers offer free ultrasounds that determine whether the pregnancy is viable – growing in the uterus (not ectopic), whether a heartbeat is present, and accurately measure how many weeks the pregnancy has progressed.

Surgical abortions, such as suction aspiration or dilation and evacuation, can be performed past 10 weeks. These procedures have higher risks and an increased chance of complications.

Pregnancy resource centers offer education about abortion procedures and information about the laws in your state and your rights in an abortion.

Adoption

Adoption is the process of legally transferring parental rights to another.

There are several different types of adoption, but the important thing to know is that you as the “birth parent” are in control of the adoption process.

Types of Adoption

From choosing whether to work with an adoption agency or with a lawyer in a private adoption, birth parents choose the adoption plan that works best for them. In a closed, or confidential adoption, there is no contact between the birth and adoptive parents; all communication is done through a third party.

Open adoptions vary in the amount of contact before, during, and after the adoption process and will look different for every individual. Again, this process largely depends on you, the birth parent, and the amount of contact you desire to have with your biological child. Adoption can be a challenging process, but the sacrificial love of a mother who finds herself unable to parent and chooses to place her child in the caring arms of a family is a beautiful gift.

Parenting

Parenting is the process of promoting and supporting the physical, emotional, social, and intellectual development of a child from infancy to adulthood.

Whether you’re thinking about parenting as a single mother or with a partner, parents need encouragement and support to raise their child. Pregnancy resource centers can connect you with mentors, childbirth and parenting classes, and other resources that can support you in the parenting process.

If you’re in the Enid, OK area we provide a free support group for mothers.

No matter what you choose, your life is forever changed. It’s important to be informed and take time to think through your options.

The post What are my pregnancy options? appeared first on Journey Women's Center | Enid, OK.